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What to do when your not happy in a relationship? |
I have been dating this man for 3 years, living together for 2. We have a baby together. Hes older then me, and has been married before. And one of our biggest problems is that he doesnt want marriage with me, or more kids.(1st wasnt planned) I am Canadian, and he is Swiss. I moved to Switzerland for him. And lately we have had a big life change with the baby and him having a better job. I dont speak German, and cant really communicate with anyone but him. I have been really unhappy in our relationship. He will stay up until 3am on weekdays playing video games, and 6am on weekends. I take care of the baby AND his other 2 kids. He knows how I feel, but says he "cant love me anymore then he does, he has other things to worry about". And it hurts, I know he is stressed, and we fixed that he can go out once a week to relax, but it doesnt make a difference in our relationship. I am unhappy, but if I leave him he will never see his son. Hes so unwilling to change or work on "us". Thats because he turned you into a babysitter. You need to spend quality time together. You need communication in your relationship. In order to have a happy successful relationship you need harmony, and be considerate of eachothers feelings. He needs to stop playing videogames and learn to do things with you that make you feel loved and happy. Bring you flowers, take you places romantic, and truly care about your feelings. just to keep myself calm n go to sleep early. why havent you left? he doesnt love you- and probably doesnt care about those kids either... i personally wouldnt stay wow, that's tough. if he doesn't want to work on the relationship, or go further with it, you owe it to yourself to get away. there's someone out there somewhere that you can be truly happy with. lol if you leave how do you know he wont see his son. you sound a bit angry there. its not hard for a man to win rights to see his children and for a court order have made so that you cannt remove the child from the state. you married him for wat he was why change him? try a coucilor and dont go takin a mans kids from him out of spite, its not about him you or both of you trying to win a petty fight. its about your kids. Kids learn what they live so do all the fighting and bickering away from them. i wish you all the best You have to be happy if you want your son to be happy. If you are very unhappy, leave him. Relationships are all about compromise, which is something he seems to lack. If you do actually go through with the break-up, he'll have to deal with the custody issue. Tell him that he needs to change his ways or you're done. If you both don't want marriage...leave. There is no use just sitting there having a miserable marriage. Its not healthy for you or your baby. If you are both truly unhappy and he is not willing to change its not worth it! |
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