Work Memo........lol?

Swearing at work Memo
Dear Employees:

It has been brought to management's attention that some individuals throughout the company have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with their co-workers.

Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated.

We do however, realize the critical importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when communicating with co-workers. Therefore, a list of "TRY SAYING" new phrases has been provided so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner.

FOR EXAMPLE:

1) TRY SAYING: I think you could use more training.
INSTEAD OF: You don't know what the f___ you're doing.

2) TRY SAYING: She's an aggressive go-getter.
INSTEAD OF: She's a ball-busting b__ch.

3) TRY SAYING: Perhaps I can work late.
INSTEAD OF: And when the f___ do you expect me to do this?

4) TRY SAYING: I'm certain that isn't feasible.
INSTEAD OF: No f______ way.

5) TRY SAYING: Really?
INSTEAD OF: You've got to be sh__ing me!

6) TRY SAYING: Perhaps you should check with...
INSTEAD OF: Tell someone who gives a sh__.

7) TRY SAYING: I wasn't involved in the project.
INSTEAD OF: It's not my f______ problem.

8) TRY SAYING: That's interesting
INSTEAD OF: What the f___?

9) TRY SAYING: I'm not sure this can be implemented.
INSTEAD OF: This sh__ won't work.

10) TRY SAYING: I'll try to schedule that
INSTEAD OF: Why the hell didn't you tell me sooner?

11) TRY SAYING: He's not familiar with the issues.
INSTEAD OF: He's got his head up his a__.

12) TRY SAYING: Excuse me, sir?
INSTEAD OF: Go fu__ yourself.

13) TRY SAYING: So you weren't happy with it?
INSTEAD OF: Kiss my a__.

14) TRY SAYING: I'm a bit overloaded at the moment.
INSTEAD OF: F___ it, I'm on salary.

15) TRY SAYING: I don't think you understand.
INSTEAD OF: Shove it up your a__.

16) TRY SAYING: I love a challenge.
INSTEAD OF: Fu__ this job.

17) TRY SAYING: You want me to take care of that?
INSTEAD OF: Who the hell died and made you boss?

18) TRY SAYING: He's somewhat insensitive.
INSTEAD OF: He's a d___k.

Thank You, Human Resources

HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!

this is the first one that has really made me laugh in a while. it is exactly how i feel... i almost said number one to someone at work the other day...oops. haha, this is the greatest, good work, you get a star, but i wish i could give you two!

LOL that was soo funny.. #12 was the best! lol

youre on a roll today huh? :) keep 'em coming. and here's a * for u. :)

That was a good one.....i like it......

well.lol

good ones there...i might f___ have to use some...

Funny! 10!

lol, 10/10, star, excellent.

If you keep on saying f__k, you are a f__k yourself.
If you keep on saying bi_ch, you are a bi_ch yourself.
If you keep on saying a__, you are an a__ yourself.
If you keep on saying sh_t, you are a sh_t yourself.
Well...I don't think you even have a brain!

Lol! i'm not sure i can do that though, i like my dirty language!

Sorry..i cant understand

hahaha gonna forward that on around the office now lolz!