I can't make it to her wedding?

I can't make it to her wedding?
My friend, who I have known for more than half of my life, is getting married soon. I just finished school and had to move far away in order to start a new job. I don't have the money to travel (my job doesn't pay much right now) to her wedding and moreover, I don't have enough money to pay for my bridesmaid dress, the hotel, etc. She knows about my situation, since I confronted her with my issue. I don't think she's mad that I can't go, but time will tell. What are your thoughts on the situation. How would you feel if your friend told you she couldn't make it to your wedding because she doesn't have the money? Would you understand?

I sent her a gift and card. I couldn't call though the night before because I thought she would be busy, which I know she is.

I absolutely would understand, given the situation. However, because of the situation, I would extend my home to my friend or try and find accommodations for her. Maybe even talk about splitting the travel expenses. If I had a friend whom I have known for over half my life, I would do whatever I could to make her a part of that special day.

I know it's very hard and hectic when trying to put a wedding together, but, if she is unable to help (which is also understandable) then I really do not think it would be the end of a friendship.

of course, as long as you told her what's going on that's all that counts!!!!! At least you're being honest with her!!!!! It's no biggy!!!!!

If she is a true friend she will either understand or come up with a way to help you to get there. If she doesn't then she was never a true friend. My guess though is that she will understand and pick someone else to be a bridesmaid. Send her a card congratulating her and wishing her the best. She will appreciate it.

She would definately understand, since this isn't your fault and you two are close friends. Could you at least send her a card or something? Do whatever is the best you can do, but don't do nothing. Try to show her that you really care. Tell her that maybe in the future, when you are financially stable, you can visit her and her husband and have some cake or something - not the real thing, but it would be kind of lake a makeup for not being at her wedding.

If she's a good friend she should understand. You have a legitimate reason for not being able to go to her wedding. If you just told her 'I'm busy that day' then I'm sure she'd be pissed but if you don't have the money then you just don't. I'm sure she's upset that her good friend won't be able to make it but she should be able to understand. If I was you I'd call her the night before and wish her luck and tell her you're sorry you can't be there and that you hope everything goes great.

If she is a good friend, she will totally understand. I'm sure she has been in the same predicament at not being able to get somewhere for lack of money. If she holds it against you, then that is her problem.

Well you know, everyone has problems , and you are not the only one. Just tell her that you are so sorry ,and that u really want to be there next to her when she is gonna do her big step , but you know you just can;t because of money . :) wish that this will really help . bye

if she is your friend then she should not be mad at u, u told her in a reasonable time(i hope) and this gave her time to make adjustments, so all you can do is send her a nice gift when u get the money, things happens in people's lives and the ones who are in your life have to be there for you or not.

I would understand. A friend if mine did as well - she sent her friend the money to come over because she could afford to do so.

If she know's your situation I think she will understand and support you for not going. If I was getting married and my friend was in the same situation I would understand and support her.

Lindy,
I would feel sad but I wouldn't be angry. You know these days a lot is done with video. You know how the soldiers in Iraq got to see their newly born children through video. Maybe something like that could be done for you so that you could attend your friend's wedding that way. You could talk to each other via the video.

Deb

if i were her i would totally understand! of course, i would be a little disappointed you couldn't go but i wont be mad at you. i mean hey you gotta do what ya gotta do. but at least you send her your regrets and a gift. good luck!