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What does it mean that my bf doesn't want to stay with me in my hotel when I visit him? Dating LD NY-Tokyo |
Dating LD since moved to NY in Sep. He said he would marry me once he got a decent job, but I fear he has changed towards me during our separation. Going back to Tokyo to visit him next week. He says coming to the airport costs too much money and time, so he thinks he won't come. I begged him to see me the day I arrive. He was very worried and nervous that that would lead to him staying with me in the hotel, something he clearly does not want to do. His tone of voice, worry and attempt to avoid this situation indicated this. Yet when I forced the question, he says he still wants to go out with me, that it is not the case that he cant break up with me out of kindness, and he would not rather be friends. Had to push for him to have lunch with me, he says he wants to limit expenditure, he is saving up for something expensive and highclass. He will tell me what it is when he sees me, but I must not tell anyone about it. Whats going on and what should I do? Been intimate in past with him. Oh no. It doesn't sound good, at all. He should be demonstrating more excitement to see you. I would try to force the question again, because you're spending all that money to visit him! The only way I can think to spin it positively is if he's planning a huge surprise for you (do you think he'd pop the question?). Regardless, let us know. I'm wondering what it is he's going to tell you in person. And I would be hesitant to follow through with the trip. Can you get a refund on your tickets? If you're spending all the money to go over there and stay in a hotel, and he can't pick you up or buy you a freaking lunch... well... don't you deserve better? Honey, with the prices of everything in Tokyo, I can understand why!!! Maybe he's got some kind of religious sword hanging over his head and feels that if he conetinues to sleep with you, he'll go to hell...or, maybe he's jumped the fence and doesn't like girls anymore! Look up into the sky, is there a building falling on your head? Do you need one to? This dude is so NOT into you! Why waste your time and money going to visit him? He won't come to the airport to get you, won't visit you at the hotel, you had to BEG him for lunch. That is not a relationship!!!! Cut your losses and walk away with the dignity you have left! Cancel the trip and use the money to find something that makes you feel good about yourself! i see it 2 ways: 1) he's done some nasty stuff while you were away and is scared to let you find out some day. so he's scared to see you because you'll be extremely mad 2) he wants to make you a surprise with something big and expensive so he wants to save as much money as possible even if he has to sacrifice paying to come see you and stuff of that nature. the bottom line is if you haven't seen your boyfriend in sometime and he doesn't want to come pick you up at the airport or even come spend some time with you at your hotel....then it's not worth trying to get anything out of it. now, i don't know, maybe you might be too blind and in love to see what's going on, but i hope you'll realize that there's no future in that kind of relationship... good luck anyway Sounds like he has you and one other on a string. He could be married and cant " get away" to spend the time with you. Hey, I would wash my hands of this and go on with my life. If he is running the scam on you, give him the heave ho and go on with your life. To many eligable guys out there looking for someone to give their love too and treat right. |
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