Help for depression??

I am going through a bout of depression right now. The suprising thing is i quit drinking, got promoted to a federal job, eat healthy, take vitamins, etc.., but im still empty inside!!! I cant ever remember a time in my life when i was happy except when i was drunk or situational reasons.. I had to stop drinking cause it caused some serious health problems(im 35 and drank since i was a teen) and i was forced to stop!! Im healthier now but i cant seem to laugh anymore, or connect with people like i want to.. I dont want meds!! i want a better way to control this... I admit im a big time perfectionist and im very picky about being my best!!! Its no surprise i do the same to other people too, but not in a vicious way.. i thought life would be better than this but its not.. I could never kill myself but i am afraid of living a miserable existence!! I have no wife or family of my own and i seldom see my family at all!

A good depression reliever is exercise.. It takes your focus off what's bothering you and it's good in general.. Exercise releases serotonin, dopamine and other nuerotransmitters in your brain.. Serotonin helps you sleep and dopamine is related to pleasure and happiness.. Those chemicals are the ones that your brain lacks when depressed .. exercise helps to balance them.. this has been clinically proven to work faster and longer than medication with no pesky side effects to worry about.. just taking a walk or doing a short exercise routine each day could really help.. this will also help to tire you for when its time to sleep.

get a good support system.. talk to friends or family members about how you feel..
Take time out for yourself each day.. to just relax, and settle your thoughts.. do things that relax you and that you enjoy..

Sunlight is also known to help combat depression. Some doctors even suggest going to a tanning salon when the season is dark and dreary.
its important that you eat healthy as many people don't eat right and that mixed with the stress it can kill the immune system and make you sick....
Its good that you take vitamins as this will help improve your immune system, especially vitamin C.

I see that you have went through alot of changes lately, although all positive, they are still radical differences in your everyday life. This alone can cause stress and anxiety.

Try not to be so critical of yourself, you have made many improvements in you life and you should try to focus on your accomplishments instead of wondering how you could have done it better. Its okay to make mistakes sometimes, thats what makes us human. You learn from them and also learn to laugh at them.

Hope this helps. Best wishes....

counceling you need to talk to someone

You should talk to a therapist. It can be very good to let some of that steam out once in a while. Also, work towards your goals, if you aren't happy with your life change it. Finally, physical exercise can be very rewarding both emotionally and mentally.

Maybe it's time to be a little more laid back and try new things. Maybe call up some friends and go play pool or go out and watch a movie. You can go to a hockey game and yell and scream and cheer even though you don't really give a flyin funk. The main thing that ppl need to realize is why care what other ppl think? You live one life. Live it how you want to live it and enjoy it will you have it. Don't care what ppl think. Don't get on meds all that is , is a fake happy. be real happy. Alot of ppl are perfectionists because they are trying to please everyone else. Please yourself for once!

Please see a doctor. Besides meds, which you don't want, they have a variety of other helps that could work for you, and can help find a great counsellor for you.
In the meanwhile, try to use a bit of exercise, get lots of sunlight, and try visualization. Most of all, get out there and meet people! The more folks you have around you, the more likely you are to be in such a down mood.
Good luck!

Other than counseling, i think that you need to change your world so it wont be so miserable, you obviously aren't satisfied in the world you are living in right now. Being a perfectionist is not easy, you have things to knit pick, thus being a perfectionist. But you need to understand the world is not perfect, and the world you live in cannot accomodate your perfectionist beliefs, so therefore you might have to accomodate a not-so-perfect world.

I commend you for shying away from meds. They cause other health problems. Try making more friends, maybe a neighbor. The holidays tend to make depression worse. Read some self-help books, do volunteer work. But get over the pity party. Its okay to do that but only you can push yourself to get out & interact with others. Surprise family members & call them or visit. Look- up HS friends see what they are up too. (www.classmates.com)

try going to your local health shop to get some St Johns wart this is a herbal remedie and has nothing that can harm you in any way .I have taken this myself and has great effect it ,dosent work straight away about 2 weeks to kick in proparly but it may be worth a try and good luck keep your head high.

I am actually a therapist and for the next month i am at home with my new baby and i would love to help you with your depression problem. e-mail me at mjriley1093@yahoo.com and I could help you over e-mails. It wont cost a thing. We can talk for the next month or even longer then that, depends on if we help your depression.

Dr. Riley

See depression treatments, at ezy-build *(below) in section 2, and consult a doctor, to eliminate thyroid problems, etc. as possible contributing factors: also seek a referral to a therapist using Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, or Rational Emotive Behavioural Therapy. It is your decision, and yours alone, as to whether to take any antidepressants offered, but, before you do, read section 1, and check medications out at www.drugs.com so you will be on the lookout for side effects, like sexual dysfunction. My strong recommendation, however, is to follow the advice of my doctor, his associate, and also Marcelle Pick, OB/GYN NP, and Dr. Mercola, as well, at http://www.mercola.com and avoid antidepressants (pages 2V, and 2Z refer, & antidepressant websites: page 2). The reasons why we all share the same view on this are explained in full, as you will find, if you read the whole section. All of their advice, (except prayer, because many people are not religious) I have incorporated into the "core treatments", including others as options, such as herbal remedies, Inositol, or SAMe. If you are diagnosed with clinical (major) depression, antidepressants may be necessary for a while, which will give the treatments time to become effective. The antidepressants themselves need at least several days, or even many weeks to become effective. It's a good idea to taper off them slowly, with medical advice, after several months, say, to a couple of years, at most, because they are only effective in the long term for about 30% of people. Because of this, you would be well advised to begin the treatments immediately, and maintain them. I'd just thank your mental health care provider, and pocket the prescription, trying the treatments for a few months, to see if they are sufficient for you, before considering filling it (unless clinically depressed, and having great difficulty functioning, or suicidal, in which case I'd take them). If the amount of daylight you have been exposed to recently has reduced, perhaps due to the change of seasons, see Seasonal Affective Disorder (S.A.D.) in section 2, at * http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris and, instead of taking 4 Omega 3 fish oil supplements, daily; replace 2 of them with cod liver oil supplements (or a teaspoonful of cod liver oil), for the winter months only! Consider having your doctor test your vitamin D levels. You only THINK you are eating healthily, and the vitamins you take may be of little help, if synthetic, most of which are produced overseas, often in China, where the standards are lower. Enter "nutritional type" at www.mercola.com SEARCHBAR Also "vitamins". Perfectionism is considered to be related to OCD, so see section 7, at ezy-build. Don't expect the same perfection from others that you demand of yourself: a very good job is quite sufficient. Old Spanish saying: "There is no happiness; there are only moments of happiness". See CBT, or REBT, as advised.