Need advice. Ok, i have a 14 month old baby, i am 31 and i dont have any education or a job. My husband is a?

director for a construction company and he is not giving me any money for groceries or anything, he has an adiction to drugs and i try to talk to him he shut the door on my face and gets realy angry or gets in the car and leave. I told him that i wish he could stay home for new year. he told me to shut fu* up... 2 years ago i was taking classes in college he told me to stop bcause he makes enough money for us that i didnt need education. Now i realized that i hate to depend on him for everything even to comunicate with my family( cause he broke my cell fhone, now i am waiting for him to buy another one) he acuses me of cheating(cause i lost weight) before i was big because i had a baby and he called me fat pig, no man wants u. He is very moody and i feel that i cant have control on my life been around him, i want to be strong for my daughter and he takes a lot energy from me. He is 48 and he not being my friend or a husband. I want to work. and get out! i am so sick of it.

That husband of yours is robbing you of your individuality lady.
He is someone no woman should put up with. I would take a deep breath, and start making plans to leave him permanently. It's going to mean total commitment on your part and once you begin the process, you can't turn back. Please don't give in. Nothing can change what he has become.

Hide his drugs and tell him you will only tell him where they are if he pays you.

Seriously, though, why did you marry this "man"?

Come on you 31? Time for you to GROW up! Drop that sucker. Go back to school get a job and do right for ya baby. And Im pretty sure youll find someone to help support you and your baby. So drop that square!

Stop letting this poor excuse for a man control your life! No one deserves to live like this. You need to get out of this situation. Talk with your family and work out a plan to leave, then get an attorney and a divorce. Show your daughter how a strong woman acts.

Then do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

youre better than that, get a damn divorce
or it will get worse and a child does not need to grow up in that environment
do it for your child
and for most yourself


and get some grants or loans for school
dont depend on any pig

Contact your nearest Domestic Violence advocates in your area or a family shelter in your county. They will help you and point you in the right direction, based on your needs.

I will pray for you and your child. Be strong. You can do this!

You are in a very bad situation. Get a lawyer as soon as possible and file for a divorce.

I have a 14 month old too! But thankfully I'm not in the same situation as you. Is there anyway you can get help with your daughter so you can either get a job or continue your education? At this point, I wouldn't worry too much about what he thinks if he is on drugs. You need to think about yourself and your daughter. See if you husband will go to rehab and counseling...if not, you really need to focus on yourself and your family and do what is best for you. God bless!

and so go and do you one day when hes a work pack up your stuff and leave go stay at a friends house he has no right to call you names and treat you like that your not his dog your his wife and leave him a note and tell him if he dont change then its over and if he really cared about you than he will change

Consult to Dr. Phil.
Why did you marry that man in the first place?
He doesn't sound that he loves you or even cares about you.
I suggest that you talk to a trustworthy friend and eventually, leave this guy and get on with your life.
Being a single mother is stressful, but I hope you will do well as you seem to have the determination.

Best wishes to you and your baby.

O.K. check your area to see if there are any women's centres around and they will advise you by taking you into a transition home where your husband can't find you and generally help you start a new life from nothing. You can do this! You are in a very abusive relationship and have to get out now, even before you can support yourself and your child.

yes I would do it that is just plain rediculous to be allowing him to do drugs around your child

Leave him. Be strong enough to do so for yourself and your child. There are people and programs that will help you until you get on your feet, plus you would have child support from him. You would be able to go back to school. It would be difficult, but it would be better than being in the abusive relationship you are in right now.

i know you probably think you still love him and couldnt bare to be without him but believe me i have been in that sitation and one day i just got my ba baby and went to my mothers and explained to her what was going on and she was more than happy to let me stay there until i was stable again.it isnt an easy thing to do and it takes alot of courage and willpower and once you have gone you may even think of going back.dont stand you ground and think of your daughter and you by doing whats best and soon you will get on with your life and realise how stupid you were to wait all that time without leaving.my life is great now when my daughter is in playschool i go on a course which at the end of it i will be a legal secretary.dont be afraid get out while you can.good luck

your husband is abusing you!
yes its true he may not be hitting you but that type of talk is abusive, please please please for both your daughters sake and yours find help or leave there should be many places willing to help you, and as for money you can try your social security thingy (not sure what its called you know government payments?)
but i am serious that is abuse, i myself have gone through it and in the end the longer you stay the harder it is to walk away because that talk makes you believe that you are worthless and without him you cannot survive or find love and happiness, if not for your sake then do it for your daughter
all the best
Angil

GET COUNSELING IF THAT DOES NOT WORK YOU MUST LEAVE. NO REPECT NO LOVE NO DEAL.
LOOK UP DOMESTIC VIOLENCE ONLINE YOU WILL SEE YOU HAVE RIGHTS IN THIS COUNTRY!!

First is you need to look into financial aid to get the heck out of there, next you can find educational programs through the county or state you live in where they will help you get your education and into a career, they will also help with childcare. This will get you out and on your feet. Then you will be independent and able to support your baby. He needs to figure out he needs help, unfortunately it doesn't sound like he is ready. You don't need to be around someone who is calling you names and breaking your phone and crap- soon your baby will be old enough to see what is happening. One important thing- don't ever be dependent on anyone to take care of you; unfortunately today...things don't work that way- count on you and only you- your baby is depending on you. Stay strong, best wishes.

You need to take control of your life back, he doesn 't want you to go to school, work or have much communication with others....... does are really clear signs of a controlling wife beater. If he is not hitting you now he will soon (hopefully not), get ready for it.... stand up for yourself, get a job, go to school if you impose your wishes what is he going to do? he'll continue to do it untill you stand up for yourself. And if need be then leave for a while until he learns, he wants to keep your self esteem down so you won't see how bad he is. Good Luck.

grow up, leave the mother fer, find a job.

his moodyness is from the drugs!
But other than that somehow get a hold of a family member, see if they can get you and the baby when he is gone one day! Leave a not tellin him that ur not comeing back unless he gets help for the drug problem cause ur not willin to live like that anymore! I would tell u to just up and leave him, but that's not as easy as everyone makes it out to be.
If ur dont want to leave at least do this for your child. What's goint o happen when (God forbid) teh baby gets sick and needs medication and he's not there to get it?
Just stay with a family member for a few weeks, and he will know and get a feel of what it's like to be alone.
Best of luck to you! Hope things get better for ya!

If what I understand, it appears that your spouse is not only controlling but abusive. Obviously he does not want you to be an independent, educated woman, and probably wants you to rely upon him, exclusively, for all your needs, as well as the baby's.

Under your circumstances it would be difficult to start anew. But, you can get a lawyer, take him to family court NOW, and begin the slow and arduous process of building a life for you and your child. If he doesn't straighten up, AND SEE THE LIGHT soon, he'll be sorry later.

Good luck to you. You are seeing things correctly.

Please hear these words CHILD ENDANGERMENT he is a drug addict int he home with your baby! if anything,and I mean anything happens from a domestic dispute to a drug bust,you knowing he is an active addict and not in recovery can get your baby taken away.the court will have zero respect for you as a mom(although it sounds like you are thinking of your baby)
please get out and let him sort out his addiction issues.Many people are correct there is help for you and grants to go to school etc. the fact that you are thinking and writing about all this means you care.Now do something.Good Luck

Yes .........I think a little abstinence may make the heart grow fonder, would be in great need of try for him.

Try finding another place to stay , maybe a woman's shelter ,Salvation Army, Catholic Charities,
even if it's just a short stay.Most you can get 14 days without paying, S.A. is 52.50 a week here

In my town we have (Loaves and Fishes) Family Assistance Program Shelters they provide daycare, ,job placement , a room ,3 cafeteria meals only for single or married parents though.
I'm sure it's not the only one of it's kinda.

The thought of a divorce , alimony , child support should cross his mind.

Legal Aid will help you with that, if needed.

Drugs suck especially when they become #1 in your life .

He has a problem that will catch up with him eventually, so you might as well prepare yourself for it anyway.

Call Domestic Violence, they will help you with shelter and food, also you can go to work and school they also can help you with babysitter, Domestic Violence will protect you and your baby from him. The court will give him visitation, but under supervision you don't need to see him . Unless you have family that can help you. But get away from that relationship is not good for you and your baby. If you live in Florida the Domestic Violence no.# is 1-800-500-1119
Good Luck!!!!!

This is a serious problem and you need professional help right away.My 1st call would be to a divorce lawer,ask for help finding a shelter for abused and battered woman,You cant do this alone.You are not strong enough you need help.Don't Waite I don't want to find you in the news paper.Once you are divorced sue for child support and alimony.During the alimony period figure out what to do for a liven.Don't waist alto of money on education if there are jobs you qualify for now, it can be a form of procrastination.Good luck.Chin up .Be strong.

If you really want to leave him you need to get an attorney to start the whole process of divorce and get the ball rolling for child support. Move in with a close family member until you can get on your feet. No one deserves to be abused, controlled or neglected.